So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
