oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
