u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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