we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
