Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
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