Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Randomize
