Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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