somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just gift wrapped bread.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
