No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
