brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
