saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
