im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
