i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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