Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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