I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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