1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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