that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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