your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
