I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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