Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Someone shit on the floor
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
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