Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize