VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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