This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
