apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
