no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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