Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Randomize
