I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
