pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
