he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
