I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
