Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Randomize
