she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
