cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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