Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Is Oprah even human
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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