oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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