4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
