let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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