dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
