Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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