no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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