Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
