worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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