she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
