Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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