we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
