I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
