Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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