My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
