I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
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