So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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